Tuesday, September 12, 2006

So... who is next?

With all this talk about the death of great Aussie icons, it had to happen...

I got an email today talking about this today, offering some suggestions on who would be next and how they would go...

First of course, in one week:

Steve Irwin killed by a wild animal (no surprise)
Colin Thiele (the great children's author) - dies of cancer at 85
Peter (Perfect) Brock dies in a car race when he hits a tree.

So, then the suggestions were...

Rex Hunt chokes on fish bone
Joan Sutherland runs out of breath
Miss Pat gets tangled in Mr Squiggle's strings (very nasty)
Valerie Taylor taken by white pointer - all that remains to
identify her are her Heidi plaits
Both Mike and Mal are lost in the Simpson desert
Paul Hogan has close encounter with a shrimp laden barbie
Greg Norman hit by speeding golf cart
Leyton Hewitt trips on a Nike shoe lace and falls head first into
trophy cabinet
Ian Thorpe strangled by pearl necklace that just wouldn't sit
right with the neckline of his outfit!

My additions...

John Howard gets blown up by a terrorist suicide bomber
John Farnham gets electrocuted while performing
Pauline Hanson gets burnt to death in her deep fryer in her new fish and chip shop (we can dream can't we?)
Eddie MacGuire chokes to death on a bone while having feasting at Machiavelli's on the company's expense.
John Laws "golden tonsils" finally say enough is enough and leap out through his mouth to strangle him.

So... Who do you think is going to be next, and how are they going to die. Go on, be creative, come up with something really left of centre as to who you want to die, and how....


bernard said...

My suggestion; Dick Smith crashes his chopper. That's upsetting. Once probate goes thru, Pippa sells Dick Smith Foods to Kraft...

Jason Appleby said...

Guys, keep it with the Aye-cons of 'Straya. Maybe we lose Boonie to cirrhosis or Merv Hughes dies of an Abdominal Aortic Aneurysm (which ruptures after a very public stretching session).

Warwick Capper could finally go after his secret penchant for continuing to wear very tight AFL shorts (for which he was famous) leads to gangrene of a testicle. Unfortunately, the gangrene spreads (an embarressed Capper failed to seek treatment) causing septicaemia and resulting in a very uncomfortable and unpleasant death.

Ray Martin may pass away from a rapidly developing leukemia or lymphoma. Autopsy would reveal that the ultimate cause of the pathological condition that lead to Martin's death was the accumulation of rare but exceptional potent carcinogens. Environmental analysis finally lead investigators to the conclusion that the source of the carcinogens was decades of the application of environmentally unfriendly, "Current Affair Strength" hair laquer.